We are our own worse enemy. Literally, every choice that we make, is of our own doing since we have free will and it is not promised that we will ever learn to become wise, however it must be apart of our design, or else we would not have this ability to be our own worse enemy.
So what is the purpose for this ability?
What is the fruit?
Where is God in this process?
It followeth, therefore, that rendering assistance unto God, in this day, doth not and shall never consist in contending or disputing with any soul; nay rather, what is preferable in the sight of God is that the cities of men’s hearts, which are ruled by the hosts of self and passion, should be subdued by the sword of utterance, of wisdom and of understanding. Thus, whoso seeketh to assist God must, before all else, conquer, with the sword of inner meaning and explanation, the city of his own heart and guard it from the remembrance of all save God, and only then set out to subdue the cities of the hearts of others. (Bahá’u’lláh, The Summons of the Lord of Hosts, p. 109-110)
After reading this scripture, it sheds a little light on the subject.
In order to fulfill our purpose of assisting others, we must first conquer our own SELF. We must learn to love ourselves. We must elevate the baser nature and move into enlightenment. So therefore, our ignorance is turned into knowledge, our self turned into soul, and our doubt is turned into faith.
The things that we use to do this are: the sword of utterance, the sword of wisdom, and understanding. The sword of inner meaning and explanation, and conquer our own heart, which is in reality a city, with many mansions. Then we must guard the city, from the remembrance of all else save God, and only then, set out, to subdue the city of the hearts of others.
So to recap, go from being our own worst enemy to our best lover. Use all of these weapons and tools that are hidden inside of our own hearts, to conquer ourselves, and if and when we are successful at this, help others to do the same thing. Repeat until our time is complete.
So this process is not flawed, but brilliant and is not left to chance, but is in order. The chaos is apart of actually leads us to the order. The pain leads to strength.
That is unconditional and true love.